It’s that time of year again where even the most cynical among us (points finger directly at self) takes a look back over the past year and decides what we are most thankful for. This year, I’m thankful for how awesome I am. That sounds obnoxious, but after a lifetime of pretty much hating myself and everything that I’ve ever done, it’s a fairly significant achievement for me to reflect on all that I have accomplished this year and the ways in which I have pushed myself to be better in my work life, my creative life and my home life, and actually come to the conclusion that yeah, I did pretty much rock it in 2012. Go me. Achieving such fantastic levels of awesoming should be more than enough, but this was a pretty solid year all around, so here’s a list of some other people and things that I’m also thankful for.
-Christina Aguilera’s boobs. Their persistent and frenzied attempts to retreat from the ever expanding borders of her ridiculously oversized belts on this season of The Voice afforded my sister and me multiple opportunities for boob-related humor, and I assure you that we made the most of it.
-Granola Thins. Thank you for being on sale at Costco that one time so I could purchase two boxes of your granola-chocolate combo deliciousness. Your advertised thinness combined with my continued assertions that dark chocolate is good for heart health has allowed me to justify eating 4-5 granola thins per day. SHUT UP, IT HAS ANTIOXIDANTS!
-The Election, for finally being over. I’m really looking forward to the next two months before the new campaign season kicks into gear.
-The Mindy Project. I was worried you weren’t going to be good, and it would be one of these situations where I really want Mindy Kaling to succeed because she’s funny and talented, so I would force myself to watch her show even if it was painfully unfunny and offensively trying too hard. But you’re actually funny! The writing is quite good and Chris Messina is hot and Mindy is decidedly not Kelly Kapoor, and Kaling has the acting chops to carry a show. But please figure out what to do with Gwen.
-My friends who have babies, for letting me play with your babies when they are cute and giggling and then letting me pass them back to you when they start to cry or smell bad. It has not helped me resolve my “do I even want babies ever?” confusion, but it has made me perfectly content with my no babies up to this point decision making. Your children are adorable and I love spending time with them (and you!), but I’m glad that the only things I’m responsible for keeping alive are a few houseplants, a well-behaved dog and fairly self-sustaining cat. Right now I get all the fun of being around adorable kids and none of the “what if my child grows up to become a serial killer?” worry. That’s a worry parents have, right? What I’m saying is, your babies are cute and I don’t think any of them will grow up to be cannibals or Fox News contributors, BUT YOU NEVER KNOW! And this is why I’m not sure about the whole kids thing…
–Wild, by Cheryl Strayed. You were a really good book and I’m thankful that I read you this year.
-Decent running weather. I feel like we had a lot of this in Baltimore this year. Or maybe I just managed to force myself out the door in spite of it all more often. Either way, it was a good running year and I’m thankful for all the stress reduction and body confidence that this activity has provided me.
-The Southwest companion pass that my husband got because he has to fly so often for work that Southwest was like, damn man, all right, well at least take along someone you like. That someone was me! I got to go on a lot of trips this year and see places that I never would have seen without that free traveling pass. Finally all those nights I’ve spent alone in bed while Dan was off in Bumble-Wherever, USA have paid off. And now they are adding a flight to Puerto Rico, so if anyone out there wants to build a sports complex down that way so that we have an excuse for another vacation, I will totally add you to this list next year.
-I should probably also thank my husband, just in general. He’s been really supportive and compassionate, and he grew an awesome beard that I find surprisingly hot.
-My family and friends, and basically all of the people in my life who make me laugh and put up with my bullshit and bother to read this blog on the regular and might think to themselves, even if it is just for a minute, “I hope Claire is having a nice Thanksgiving.” Thank you for thinking of me, and being there for me and for being interested in my ridiculous stories and my overly-expressive daily rehashing and all of the other nonsense of my life. Thanks for listening when I complain about bullshit that makes me seem entitled and privileged and maybe even a little bit spoiled because really, who cares if my neighbors are loud at night, or if those damn kids on the street hit the front of my house with a ball enough times that it finally knocked the numbers off and now it looks like we just live at 1? These are petty concerns and silly frustrations, but really most of life is just silly frustrations and the great thing is that sometimes you’re lucky enough to find people who will listen to your complaints and respond with things like, “yeah, stupid kids.” Stupid kids, indeed. Get off my lawn.
-Thanks to the Detroit Tigers for winning the World Ser– oh no, wait. Scratch that.
-But there’s always next year. There’s always tomorrow. And for that, I am very thankful.
The Claire, The 